Ballin’ On A Wednesday

A magazine is debuting my new hit single! The mag is called Glide. Since today is Wednesday, we decided it was the perfect day to release this track.

The song is called Ballin On A Wednesday. I wrote it with my pal Anthony Da Costa.

Please help a brother out and share this with all yer pals everywhere.

Listen now! And turn it up loud.

I guess if you click this article you’ll see a link to hear the song. I haven’t tried it because I’m eating a taco but a friend told me it works.

Gin rummy

So I was moving some stuff around in my Dad’s apartment. We were reorganizing and tossing out various pieces of furniture and old clothes and vases and dust collectors.

My dad told me that before my mom died she told him she would try to contact him from the other side. If, there was another side. He said they weren’t really sure what they believed.

Anyways, My father kept telling me stories about my mom as we were pursuing old photographs. At one point he said to me “a couple of months before your mom died we wanted to start playing gin rummy. We used to love that game. We looked all over but didn’t even have a deck of playing cards. We had all this other crap from this store called Homegoods. We looked everywhere and I couldn’t believe we couldn’t find one deck of damn cards. So we never got play one last game”

We both sighed and got back to moving stuff around. We picked up this little bookshelf full of dusty old novels and as we moved it something fell out and hit my dad’s feet. We both looked down at the same time and it was this pack of cards. They even said “gin rummy” on them. I looked at him and he looked at me and we both got goosebumps and let the tears fly.

Oh hi mom! Very strange.

Miracle!

Miracle of all miracles. My dad Joe Poltz just got released from the hospital!

4 days ago the doctors told me it could go either way and to prepare for possibly the worst. But here he is!Alive and kicking.

He’s super weak but that’s what 10 days in the hospital with pneumonia will do to you when you’re soon to be 89. Or any age for that matter.

Oh yeah, he also had a couple heart attacks. Yikes!

Look at that horrible bruise down his left arm.

Thanks so much for all your positive wishes and prayers and candles and everything else. I believe they helped.

He’s got some rehab to do to get walking again but the first thing I did was sit him in the beautiful sunshine. He was so pale.

So many people reached out and I’m super appreciative.

A highlight for my dad was when Dave Roberts (manager of The Dodgers) personally called my dad and said “Joe, I wanna talk baseball with you.” My dad has been a Dodger fan since 1960 and he was shocked! Thanks to Tim Flannery coming in for a visit and helping set this up!

Thank you, thank you, thank you. I’m crying as I type this.

Hold on hope. Prayers for my father

I’m trying so hard to stay positive. My dad is struggling to beat pneumonia. He’s been in the hospital for 7 days now. I’m holding steady at his bedside playing guitar and singing him songs and watching football. I feel so worried. At 88 years old it’s so hard kick this bug out of his system. He’s wheezing so heavily and can’t seem to get comfortable. We are hoping to catch a break here. I keep changing flights. I thought I’d come home to San Diego for 4 days for Christmas and I’ve been here since December 11th. I fear my mom’s passing has taken a lot out of him.

The pneumonia makes him loopy and he’s in and out of sleep.

He’s trying to hold on. He really is. Please angels. Please.

Thoughts on losing my mom

Thoughts on losing my mom-

The overwhelming amount of support has been incredible. I can’t thank you guys enough.

So many friends have reached out and I’m eternally grateful.

I’ve been with my dad everyday since her passing and we’ve spent whole days going through her belongings and rearranging their place. So many tears and so many memories.

We’ve gone out to the movies twice. We saw The Mule and we also saw Green Book. It’s been a nice distraction. My dad loves going out to the movies as much as I do. We’ve had dinner together every night. It’s a blessing to have him around. I’ve completely cleared my schedule through Jan 5. There’s so many things to do when someone close to you passes. You have to deal with death certificates and doctor and dental appointments and social security and old clothes and knickknacks. There are so many phone calls to make. Each time I speak with someone the tears start flowing again. It’s healing. I’m all in.

This experience is bringing me even closer to my father. It’s also bringing me closer to my sister and niece and nephews. Kathy has been laid up with a nasty flu bug. This whole ordeal has been so stressful.

One of things I’ll miss the most about my ma is our New York Times Op Ed discussions. I don’t have anybody to do that with anymore. We were both NYT junkies. I’d call her up and say “did you see the article Maureen Dowd wrote? Did you read Gail Collins’ piece? What do you think about the latest David Brooks article on religion? Oh my god did read Ross Douthat’s article about the election? Did you see that beautiful Roger Cohen piece about Israel? Did you read Thomas Friedman’s op-ed about Palestine? Did you read Michelle Goldberg’s article this morning?”

I mean, this went on and on and on. She was so smart. That’s what I’ll miss the most.

I’m gonna get back out on the road in January because that’s what you’d want me to do. I love you.

I found this cool photograph from many years ago and it made think about my mom. She was a great English teacher and choir director. She also played guitar and piano. She always used to say to me “Steven, remember these three things when writing- Who was there, what happened and how did it make you feel?”

Well ma- we were in Pasadena California and you were there and I was there. You were squeezing me and I was laughing. It made me feel safe and loved. Thank you.

Goodbye mom. I love you

How do you say goodbye to your mom? That’s what I’m wondering. After sitting in high alert mode holding her hand and singing to her she passed away at 9:38 pm on Thursday December 13, 2018. I was with her. She took her last breath and was finally at peace. She was 88 years old.

The sound of the oxygen tank was mechanical, meditative and mesmerizing. Her beloved dog Sunny looked so worried. It’s amazing what dogs know. She kept guard at the foot of the bed and kept crawling under the covers and then crawling out and slowly kissed my mom.

I knew this would be painful but I didn’t expect such a punch in the gut. I feel so bad for my Dad. They were married for 61 years.

I don’t know how he continues without her. He loved her so very much. I will never forget the sound of his grief and tears.

The last 48 hours have been a crazy ride. Crushed up morphine and Ativan helped ease her pain and anxiety and she went peacefully. Thank God for the instructions the hospice care nurses gave us. Sharon and I ground up the morphine and mixed it with a small amount of water and spooned it into my mom’s mouth every 2 hours. She was knocked out and opened her eyes every once in a while and it startled me.

I played and sang Amazing Grace, Make You Feel My Love, Pancho and Lefty and heaps of my own songs. My fingertips are feeling it. My mom loved my album One Left Shoe so I think I played every song on that record at least 3 times.

She also loved Michelle Obama so I read her Michelle’s book and I swear I felt my mother could hear me. She’d slightly smile as I read certain passages.

I’m really gonna miss calling my mom on the telephone. She was always so happy to hear my voice. She’d say “Stevie! How’s my beautiful boy doing? I love you so much.” She kept so many newspaper articles about me and was so proud. I already feel a void. Who am I gonna call when I’m really proud of something that only she would appreciate?

This all happened so fast. I was just dancing with her a couple weeks ago. I thought she’d be around another few years. Everyone loved my ma. She’d look you in the eye and ask you all kinds of questions.

The next thing you know it’s all over. The Trident Society pulls up in a white van and covers her and zips her up and wheels her away on a stretcher. Her green dress, her grey bra and her yellow socks. That’s what she left in. Her vessel. A green dress, a grey bra and yellow socks. That’s it. The undertaker had us write down what she was wearing. Those were her possessions.

The undertaker looked like an undertaker. He was dressed in black and had dark circles under his eyes. He was very calm. I wonder if undertakers start to look like that because of all the death they’re surrounded by?

Winifred Catherine Poltz was loved by so many. I feel so bad for my sister Kathy. She loved her so much. Kathy feels things and is an empath to the nth degree. I love her. My mom loved her.

Winnie was so beautiful and so smart. She had beautiful expressive eyes. She loved to read. She could blow through a book in one day. She could talk politics with the best of em and made the best spaghetti sauce in the whole wide world. She taught me how to write and encouraged my music. She’s my mom and now she’s gone.

How do you say goodbye to your mom?

I love you ma. God bless you.

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