Michael The Space Dog

spacedog.jpgI am Michael the space dog. I am the descendant of an ape from Ghana and I didn't write that horseshit below. I am an educated dog with a degree in Spanish and astrophysics. Sure, I lived in a space ship and survived on Alpo and watched reruns of Bonanza, but I haven't barked in years. In fact I consider barking to be a rude pastime practiced by druid dogs from Mars. I enjoy making shrimp scampi and even went to Japanese cooking school and make a mean hamachi roll. Even though I don't have thumbs most of my rolls come out perfect. My father was Berber tribesman form Fez and immigrated to to Spain on a 3 week doggy visa. He got a job in a tapas bar and soon debunked the myth of opposable thumbs being necessary for work visas. The Spanish government soon gave him a grant and he began his quest to make me an outer space dog. After my first communion I entered college. I was laughed at by the other students but soon acquired a 4.0 grade point average. This shut those bastards' pie holes, and before I knew it I was up up in space sending messages to the wailing hyenas below. I was accused of government espionage and stripped of my title as space dog and now I just walk the mean streets looking for internet cafes to surf the net for doggy style porn. I'll write you guys again soon but in the mean time I would like to let you know that there are some good recipes for Thanksgiving side dishes on the internet. Oh yeah, Steve says hi. Hasta Luego, Michael the space dog