Da elephants are chasing me

Today all decisions will be coffee decisions powered by caffeine and they will be irrational sleep deprived decisions. Elephants are chasing me through the streets and the gutters are on fire with gasoline fumes climbing lung ladders and koala bears are stoned to the nines on eucalyptus leaves. Newspapers are free and when you're handed one the ink stains turns into tribal tattoos made of henna. People are begging on street corners and when you toss a coin their way their eyes light up firetruck red and steam pours out of their ears. Trucks are barreling down one way streets with machine gun toting little kids spraying the sidewalks with stray bullets as dogs dance. The world has changed and we are just passengers along for the ride. Cover your ears Granny! We're floating towards the end of time as the calender pages flutter along in the wind. Have some cereal kids and fasten your belts for we are a headed to 2000 and eleven. It's a bumpy ride so wear a helmet and bring along a canteen. Even if a bird craps on you it'll mean good luck for the coming year.

The Life of Stevesteve poltz