Upcoming shows!

Here are some upcoming shows I have planned.
June 23- Effingham Illinois- Moccasin Creek Festival
June 26- Nashville TN- The Basement
July 5- Oakville Ontario- Moonshine Cafe
July 6- Waterloo Ontario Canada- Starlight Social Club
July 7, 8 and 9- Orillia Ontario Canada – Mariposa Folk Festival
July 13 – Murrieta CA- Murrieta Arts Studios
July 14- Ramona CA – Ramona Mainstage
July 15 – Piedmont CA- House Concert KC Turner Presents
July 16- Mendocino County- Redwood Ramble (11 am show)
July 16- Novato CA – Hopmonk Novato (6pm show) yes 2 shows in one day!
July 19- La Jolla CA -Birch Aquarium Green Flash Concert Series
July 26 – Decatur Georgia- Eddie’s Attic

July 29 and 30- Cisco Grove Campground CA – Guitarfish Music Festival
Aug 2- Ketchikan Alaska- North Tongas Community Club
Aug 4-6 – Ninichik Alaska – Salmonfest Music Festival
Aug 9- Collingwood Ontario Canada – Simcoe St Theatre
Aug 10- Owen Sound Ontario Canada – Heartwood Concert Hall
Aug 11-13- Kingsville Ontario Canada- Kingsville Folk Festival
Aug 15 – Bedford Nova Scotia- Patchwork House Concerts
Aug 16 Iona Cape Breton! Nova Scotia – Frolic And Folk Pub
Aug 18- St Johns Newfoundland- Holy Heart Theatre
Aug 19- Gander Newfoundland- Gander Arts and Culture Centre
Aug 20- Corner Brook Newfoundland- Corner Brook Arts and Culture Centre
Aug 21- Grand Falls-Windsor Newfoundland- Classic Theatre
Aug 22- St John’s Newfoundland- The Ship
Aug 24-26- Burlington Newfoundland – The Gathering Festival
Aug 27 – Upper Amherst Cove Newfoundland- Bonavista Social Club 
photo by Drea MacDonald


Whoa! I just invented something really cool!

Instead of ending an email with–> Cheers and Thanks,
I now just say Chanks®.

If you guys use this please let me remind you that I get 6 & 3/4 cents for each use.

Also remember that although I am an attorney for dogs, I’m also able to litigate with humans. Of course that means you thieves. I don’t mind you using Chanks® but I will sue you for copyright infringement if you don’t pay me.

Steven JJ Poltz esq.

**Of special note- Jon Dee Graham doesn’t have to pay because he played guitar with me on that cool Sly And The Family Stone song.

*** also of note- the cool person who took this photo doesn’t have to pay me. I probably owe them but I can litigate this for years and wear them out.

The World

It seems like the whole world is on a tightrope and the people holding the rope are swinging it to and fro without any rhyme or reason. It also seems the tightrope walkers are drunk and disorderly and potentially hostile. 
It’s a house of confusion with a booster shot of angst. I kinda feel like I want to move to a new planet. Perhaps Tralfamadore. 
If one country wiggles the other country waggles. We are wigwams with big bombs. 
Hotlines buzz. Buzz saws are hot. Pot is legal except where it’s not. 
Russia’s leveling threats. North Korea’s placing bets. China has debts while England frets. Meanwhile- we have regrets. 
Does anyone have a new prescription for chill pills? We need newfangled super duper chill pills but they’re probably not covered under the current plan. 
Let’s vote us a new SCOTUS. The current one is starting to bloat us. They goad us and then they tote us to where they showed us without any notice. 
Lord Ballsack had a heart attack ack ack ack ack ack. He oughta know by now. 
How do you solve a problem like Maria? 
Is love the answer? Well— that’s where it gets confusing. Love is in many cookbooks but there are differing opinions on how many cups we need. Some folks are only using teaspoons. Others minuscule eyedroppers. 
Sure, love is good. Love is patient wayshent nayshent but it leaves a dent. 
Dents are good and bad. Sometimes they’re able to be repaired. Other dents just look really cool because they tell a story. 
The earth has a huge dent in its moral cavity. Perhaps if we stick a straw in the equator and blow real hard we can push the dent back out. 




Ughhhhhh— Rhymes with lalalalalalalalalalalalalalala. 
And there you have it. I solved the puzzle. The puzzle is us. We are puzzled. The solve is that we’re unsolvable. That’s why we need to laugh more. Because  it’s all a game. A silly little game of dress up and make believe. Lay down your guns. Everyone. Now. It’s an order. Go outside and play. Hug someone. 
Because I said so.